One Red Hot Country Mama!

2011 started with my boy being born, and ended with a car accident involving Matt and AJ, making me scared that I lost everything. The car is a wreck, but my boys are fine. Running through the snow from my house to the accident site downtown, I had my heart in my mouth. Matt said I got there in about five-and-a-half seconds. I turned the corner and the car was diagonally pointed down a flight of stairs, with the nose on the play centre building where AJ and I go sometimes. How did they get out?

Then I saw Matt with no jacket on as the freezing rain poured on him, with him holding it in his arms instead. When he opened up the jacket, bright blonde AJ was in there smiling at me with his brightest smile with heat emanating from him, and I knew they were both okay.

2011 was discovering that I could have a family. I grew up in a hospital with the Doctors and Nurses playing with me while my Mum visited my very sick father. 30 years ago my Dad, a very tall, intense, intellectual guy, died after a gruelling battle with Malignant Melanoma. I missed him so much. The rest of my family could not really be there for me so I did a lot for myself. I spent a lot of my life feeling on the outside. I had friends who loved me a lot, but I missed having a family in tact.

But now even I can have a family of love and support. I have this extraordinary guy who is wise and knowing and makes me laugh so much and loves me for me – even though I sometimes don’t understand why. I wish I could.

In 2011 I realized that I loved the exhausting bone-tired marathon that is being a Mom. It is the biggest surprise of my life. Before I thought it would be just piles of laundry and boringness in general but it is so rewarding and full of love. At my most tired – he will smile at me and energize me like nothing before. I am so lucky that I can do my work from home, and spend so much time with our special guy.

For 2012, there are going to be a lot of changes ahead. We realized small-town life is not for us and we are making a move back to the urban life where we belong. I am also making some positive changes in my work. I am and will always be an entrepreneur, but it needs tweaking. I just want to fill my life with more positivity and love. And more people too so AJ can grow up with lots of role models and we can have more fun. Thank you to those who have made this ride so great this year, here is to an amazing year in 2012.