One Red Hot Country Mama!

I have been thinking about the concept of the Toxic Handler in the past few days as I’ve seen some colleagues struggling through work issues. A Toxic Handler is a person in an organization who buffers the negatives for the rest of the team  – by negatives I mean layoffs, change or dealing with difficult people. It is the guy who takes the brunt of the pain from a difficult boss for the rest of the team stoically. It is the woman who will shoulder the sadness, anger and frustration for everyone else, while continuing to make sure that high quality work gets done. This is the kind of person that most organizations would love to hire because they produce great work in even the most difficult circumstances.

I have both worked with toxic handlers and been a toxic handler myself. While it is noble to help people while in need, it can actually be hard on the person’s health. According to the original article by Peter Frost and Sandra Robinson they are at a higher risk for burnout and even physical issues such as heart attacks.

After seeing a colleague go through the incredibly stressful experience of being a toxic handler for the rest of the team, I think that really it isn’t fair for one person to absorb the pain for everyone else. When a person feels pain, even organizational pain, they then have the choice to make a change to do something about it. Buddhist thought says, "pain is the prelude to enlightenment". If the Toxic Handler comes in to buffer that pain, the person will not notice enough to make a change, and the half-broken situation continues to break more. Instead of relying on themselves, the person in trouble continues to depend on the Toxic Handler. Since they might be buffering the pain of several colleagues at once, the stress of being a Toxic Handler is amplified.

So – even though some think of the Toxic Handler as an organizational hero, I think that they are actually people who prevent others from seeing what the true problem is. We are all grown-ups, we can take care of ourselves. We don’t need another hero .