Live Your Life Be Free!

I remember when I got out of school and started my first corporate job, some strange things were happening. Even though I was a Marketing Analyst, the receptionists told me that I would have to take the phones on their breaks. Also, people would give me their coats and ask me to take messages for my boss. Eventually I figured it out… because people were used to young women being assistants and receptionists in that office, they did not "get" that I was there to analyze the business and market products. So – my young looks and my gender trumped my education, good grades, skills or even job description to them.

My sister-in-law, who is a physician, had the same problem when she started interning – the nurses assumed she was a nurse too, and there was a very awkward moment when she was asked to change bedpans! My brother, who is also a physician, never had an issue. Of course, my sister-in-law and I set them straight, but if you think that the old-fashioned attitudes are gone – think again!

The opposite is also true. I worked with a man who owned a PR company, which he started in his early-20s. He said the secret to starting his business young was that he started balding when he was 22, so people thought he was older and more trustworthy at an early age. I guess I never had the ‘luxury’ of balding .

This weekend something else strange happened. During Easter, people kept asking me about my son – how old he was, what grade etc. My son? I don’t have a son! Then I figured it out – my 5-year-old nephew and I are very close, we kept playing together and he kept coming to me and there is a pretty strong family resemblance – so from that they assumed he was mine. Again, I set them straight – but it surprised me that people thought I was a Mom when I think of myself as a single-urban-career-chick ready for the next adventure.

So – maybe this isn’t all that revelatory, but I tend to think of the world on a pretty equal basis. Meaning, you are your ideas, your words, your warmth, your experiences… not your looks, your race, your age, your gender or your act. I remember my Psychology 101 professor saying he perceived people as "floating brains", culling away all outside appearances and seeing people for what they are. But, I see most people don’t think that way. Actually, some people laugh their heads off when I explain the "floating brains" thing. It’s too bad because I think it is a pretty good ideal to strive for.